One Easy First Lesson Toward Raising Independent, Happy Children

In my opinion, the key to raising independent kids is to teach them responsibility and accountability. Obviously, you can’t go up to a two-year-old and say, "Listen, Alex, today you will be responsible for cleaning your room and if it is not clean, I will hold you personally accountable for it!" So instead, I am taking small daily actions that teach him these values.

I came up with the following little nifty trick. It works for any toddler who is stable enough and comfortable enough walking on his own. In my case, it happened when my kids were about 14 months old and it always worked:


Step 1:

For a week, start to show your toddler that mommy and daddy carry their own bags. Let your little one check the bag contents and go over it with him. On a daily basis, ask your toddler to help you by putting or taking out a needed item into or from the bag. Stand by him while he gets the comb or pen for you and opens the bag and drops it in. Compliment him on a job well done! You’ll see that he is supercharged with excitement because he is "helping" you.


Step 2:

At the end of the week, start showing your little one that big kids from his daycare carry their own bags. Wouldn’t he like to have one, too? If you’ve done your job exciting him in the build-up about your bag, he’ll probably jump at the chance to be like the older kids! “Now let’s go to the store and let YOU choose your very own, because you are a big boy too!”


Step 3:

Take him to Wal-Mart or Target. They have small carry-ons with wheels for kids. Have your child go over ALL the available bags and choose his favorite. You want your child to be as involved as possible, leading the process. Don't choose for him. After choosing a bag that he wants, let your little one be in charge of actively paying for it and taking it out of the store. Let him show it off and tell everyone about it!


Step 4:

At home, ask him to bring his favorite items and place them on the kitchen table or countertop. Ask him to place them in his bag. Let him open the bag and place them inside. Once the items are inside, walk around with him and let him proudly wheel his carry-on around.


Step 5:

Leave the bag close to the door so that every time you leave the house, it will be there, reminding him to take it. This is wonderful training for taking the bag to and from daycare everyday--not to mention that you can hitchhike on this and put the rest of his items in it as well: such as diapers, towels, food, change of clothes and more.

Just think how this one simple habit will make life so much easier for your child and for you throughout all the school grades!

During a routine physical, Levin learned he had an irreversible and life-threatening kidney disease. He was 26 years old – the doctor doubted that he would see 30. But, despite this news, he refused to give up his dream and today, thirteen years later, lives in Atlanta, with his wife Michelle and their two children. He is the author of the book The Diaper Chronicles– A stay at home dad’s quest for raising great kids, based on his experience’s, available through his website at http://www.baracklevin.com.

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